2004 Snapper News!
Welcome to the inside scoop. DaBlade hits the road so you don't have to, to report the news you really don't care about.
DaBlade interviews Democrat nominee, John Kerry
"I actually shot a par 3 BEFORE I shot a double bogie 5," argued Kerry during his golf interview with Snapper reporter, DaBlade.
John Kerry dons a turtle costume while stumping for Snapper golf league members' votes. He was kind enough to agree to a golf interview with me and answered my questions candidly.
D: Thank you for taking this time with me during what must be a very hectic convention week.
D: Actually no, but we're just getting started here. But since you've brought it up, didn't you admit to war atrocities in Vietnam? I believe you admitted to the killing of innocent women and children and the burning of villages.
D: OK. Sounds like you earned your medals sir. If you are so pro-military, why then are you so set on usurping our national security to the French and those pinheads at the UN - and why did you vote to send our troops to war and then vote against the FUNDING at every opportunity?
D: Much political hay has been made by the democrats of the WMDs, and the post 9-11 Bush Doctrine of preemption. Isn't it true that Iraq was considered a threat even by the Clinton administration, British and Russian intelligence agencies, as well as the rest of the civilized world, as evidenced by the UN sanctions?
D: Hmmm. Let's move on to the economy, stupid. President Clinton addressed the delegation earlier this week, and he stated that, "our way is the better way," as it relates to the economy. What do you believe he meant by this?
D: How inspiring of you to admit this. Why then do you want to roll back the tax cuts on the top 2% when they are the ones that pay 47% of the entire tax base? Aren't you penalizing the entrepreneurs and small businesses that actually create jobs and do the hiring?
D: These policies create a dependency class that perpetuates power for the democrats, isn't that right?
D: Speaking of abortion, you've been quoted as stating that you believe life begins at conception. How then, sir, can you rationalize your stance on abortion rights, and advocating the mining of stem cells from these innocent souls for what you claim is the advancement of science and medical research?
K:Let me just say this. No pile of dead babies is too high if it could lead to certain breakthroughs in medicines. A cure for Parkinson's disease? Who cares? But what if a new form of longer lasting botox injections could be discovered. I could look like an animated corpse even longer!
D: Thank you for your time sinister... I mean Senator.
END OF TRANSCRIPT
Links of interest:
Who is Michael Moore?. Sadly, he originates from Davison, MI. But so did 1980 Olympic hockey gold-medal winner Ken Morrow, and Davison is home to the Sugarbush Snapper Golf League!
This land is your land, sung by John Kerry and George Bush. Well worth the load time!